You read it right. I’m really getting tired of you. The way you make me happy at times and left me lingering at other times; keeping me company when I needed but sometimes just trying to catch your shadows. Stripping my time and talent for multitasking which is kinda important to me. Even so, you would still never left me go when I was just focusing on one thing. You still gotta torture me with you ever mood swings. How am I suppose to catch it before it happens? I can’t predict your actions. Am I just too demanding to even ask for you to be giving in to my needs of needing and having you with me all the time? The feeling you left me hanging and waiting and more waiting is not a very good feeling, do you even know? Praying all the time that you would be considerate. You like to take your time to toy with my feelings. Well, you have succeeded in getting me having to crawl all over you if that was your motive.

Do you know that everyday I would wish for a better time with you? Even when I’m in a different place now. Everyday I would hope that you might surprise me and not letting me down in my expectation. But why after these few days you’ve changed dramatically? What happened to our relationship? Why do you treat me like this? Why? After these short period. What happened to what we had in the past? What happened to the times where we manage to go through? Why did that have to change now after all the rains, thunders, lightnings, rushing waters and typhoons? You’ve promised that I could have all of you with nothing more in return.

I’m really tired of you. After so many events you still don’t know that you mean so much to me. So much so that I’ve tried all that I could to continue to have you. I had trusted you and I still trust you even when there are better ones out there which has better plus points then you. Yet I know that back in my head that you would not fail me BUT now it might have proved otherwise. Do you intend for me to see that one day I’ll turn away from you? One day that this trust is no longer there? One day that we will only be just you and I? You be you and I be I, there’s no we in the context anymore. I’m still learning to accept your mood swings but it is getting more and more outrageous. It is like you’re taking advantage of me, ‘punishing’ me when you get the chance.

What more can I say when you don’t even wanna hear. I could guess that you won’t even take a look or even give a slightest glance to this matter and yet all I could do is wait on you only. This is so not me to even do such a thing to begin with. Still, I could not blame you nor putting all the fault on you. Like I said, you like to take your own sweet time to just make me suffer, with gladness I don’t know. I thought the last time when we parted for a while would be the worst and would have a refresh mind later on. Now….. I really have no idea anymore.

Moving at such slow pace. Leaving me for days and getting worst. You left me hanging and insecure. Not knowing what will happen next, for seconds, minutes, hours or even days. It’s really hard to guess. I’m really getting tired. Why does our love hate relationship have to go on? When will it come to an end? Or will it be forever in this state?

Why internet, why?!